


Kiss Me, You Animal

by 2trangerMcDanger



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Awkward Crush, Awkward Romance, Blood, Blood and Violence, Crushing, Decapitation, Gore, Love crushing not body crushing, M/M, Quadrant Confusion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:35:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22984891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2trangerMcDanger/pseuds/2trangerMcDanger
Summary: As you watch, your heart pounds in your chest and you feel light in the head. When you glance up at Sollux again, the light from his eyes illuminates his facial features, like smoothed out marble or paint on a canvas. The way he exuded such power turned your legs and organs to jelly. Your eyes rapidly move from him to his victim so fast, you're surprised they didn't pop out of your skull and roll into the nasty, cold blood that's now all over your doorstep.xxxdraft 2
Relationships: Sollux Captor/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	Kiss Me, You Animal

**Author's Note:**

> another one of those really self indulgent tangents. Enjoy

You hated the sound of Sollux's voice. The way it hitched up when he was upset or excited or angry, or the ratty little snicker he did that made your whole head heat up with pure rage and embarrassment. The only thing that would make his voice any more unbearable is if you heard it in person instead of through your shitty speakers.

Or through your shitty window, in the present moment along side a sharp knock from his knuckles on the glass that's only terrifying to you, really.

There's no way he's getting in here. You're not even for sure how he got your address in the first place, but knowing his "apeshit bananath hacking thkillth" he probably broke the law a few times hacking into your location, despite having it turned off. Regardless, your window is locked and you know he wouldn't break anything to get in, so he's stuck hovering outside and tapping at the glass while you sit just out of sight next to the window.

The idea of letting someone in your hive, in your personal space, or fuck, your _impersonal_ space makes you immensely uncomfortable and afraid. All it would take is one touch of skin on skin contact and your cover is totally blown. Or one look at your face going red as a flower and you're dead meat.

TA: you know you cant hiide iin there forever.  
TA: and iim not goiing away anytiime 2oon at lea2t.   
CG: I WISH YOU KNEW HOW STUPID THAT STATEMENT YOU JUST SAID WAS.  
CG: WOW HAHA KARKAT CANT STAY IN HERE FOREVER???? WANNA BET YOU FUCKING LOSER????  
CG: KARKATS *BEEN* STAYING IN HERE FOREVER. YOU DONT KNOW THE MEANING OF STAYING IN HERE FOREVER BASED ON HOW LONG IVE BEEN STAYING IN HERE FOREVER.  
CG: I COULD WIN A FUCKING CONTEST OF STAYING IN HERE FOREVER THAT'S HOW LONG IVE BEEN  
CG: HEY DONT FUCKING IGNORE ME I CAN SEE YOU, YOU KNOW.

Sollux isn't even looking at his phone, trying to peek into your window with his gross little fingers all over the glass. You catch a quick glimpse at him and it scares you enough to jump and scoot a little bit away. Your nose scrunches up as you read over your messages and you wonder if he always just ignores you until you have sufficiently "gone off" and then responds.

You're not even entirely sure why he cares so much. Usually when something presents this much of a challenge and is not related to being a computer, he doesn't give enough of a shit. He's tried this stunt once before and gave up after at least thirty minutes, but tonight he's been floating out there for at least two hours. You're about to stick your head out the window just to really scream at him to show him you're serious when you hear the distinct and unmistakable sound of rocks hitting glass and you can't help but peek out.

Jesus what a fucking wriggler. You thought he'd have enough respect for you not to fucking break shit but it looks--Oh. It's not him throwing the rocks.

When you peek out, you see another troll, big, stocky and indigo, throwing rocks at _him,_ shouting things you can't quite make out. He does a pretty good job at dodging from what you see but a lot of them are hitting your window, and you're not in the mood to be fixing that shit again, and having an open entrance in your hive that you have no way of closing is first of all dangerous as fuck, and second of all DANGEROUS AS FUCK.

You're on the second story and get to scampering downstairs to open the window and scream at whoever the fuck is throwing stones at your bro and hopefully scare them off. "HEY FUCKER," you shout. "BREAK MY SHIT AND I BREAK YOU." You catch Sollux, a sparkling ball of red and blue lights out of the corner of you eye and stare down the indigo. You don't realize until after it's left your mouth that the phrase could have been interpreted to mean that _Sollux_ is "your shit" and you feel a pit of embarrassment in your gut that you shove down. You also don't realize what a horrible, asinine mistake you've just made until you get a good look at who you're squawking at.

The highblood isn't far from your door and he just saunters up to you like he knows you, a big smile in his beartrap of a mouth and small, far apart blue eyes squinted down at you. He's gotta be at least six and a half feet tall, biceps bigger than your head and horns that would clack against your doorway if he tried to trollhandle his way into your hive. You shrink back by the sheer momentum of him walking up to you. A humiliating squeak escapes your throat and you immediately try to slam your door shut with as much strength as your body can muster, but he jams his foot in the way and your whole body feels cold as you start to hyperventilate.

You, Karkat Vantas, have done lots of stupid, _stupid_ things in your short, yet excruciatingly long life, but this one really tops the pile, kicking all the stupid shit you've ever done right in the face with how ridiculously moronic it is. The stranger pries the door open with his leg and looks down at you with his chin tilted up. "What's the matter, squishmeat? You're the one that called me over." His voice is so deep and gravely, you could pave a road with it when he speaks. The more he does so, the more you tremble under his words.

He reaches a hand at you and you flinch while starting to remember any of the good days you had on this planet, when the highblood's entire arm is enveloped in that red and blue light and stopped in mid-air. The highblood hesitates for a second and his legs are surrounded by that same light and he's slammed into the hard-packed dirt in front of your door, knees first and you hear a crack. Your breathing is still hard and shallow as the highblood looks confused, and then enraged, right up at you and locking eyes.

Before you can even use your stupid head to start putting pieces together, Sollux is standing right behind the troll he's seemed to capture. Oh. Right. You forgot about him.

Sollux's face is expressionless, his already narrow eyes were nothing but colorful slits, glowing wildly with sparks collecting around his horns and hands. The rings of power keeping the highblood on the ground glow even brighter when your friend gets closer to him. His brows are slightly knitted together in a way you're very familiar with. It's the face he makes when he's genuinely pissed, the face he makes when your words hit too close to heart. It's the face he makes at you for half a second before hanging up on your video calls because he's just _that_ pissed at you. Despite the empty solid colors, you can tell his gazed is fixed on his prisoner, and you can tell when he cocks his gaze up at you, quirking a single eyebrow up. He's asking you a question, silently, but you don't know what it is, so you shrug in response, still high on fear and the near-death experience. He closes his eyes briefly, and returns your shrug.

The indigo is--you want to say whipped around, but it's more like he was _dragged_ around to face Sollux, slowly, and knees grinding into the ground below him. His chest is heaving, the last slice of his eye you catch before the back of his head was completely to you was that of rage so crazy, it was like he couldn't even speak.

You hear the beginning of a syllable and the raspy gasp of someone about to open their mouth and scream when the trunk of his neck is crushed in an nightmarish way and surrounded by that red and blue again, crinkled like a soda can but without a fist surrounding it so you can see all the little folds and scrunches of skin. The colored light takes hold of the indigo's horns and you can see his back and shoulder's straighten, tilting his head up. You're pretty sure it's all involuntary. Sollux takes a step forward, face unchanging and eyes glowing even brighter then you thought they could be, like two light bulbs screwed in his sockets. You see his hand reach for the highblood's face and hold it, out of sight to you.

You don't realize it's to keep him steady so he can spit directly in the other's eye until after it happens. There hasn't been a sound for so long; it startles you. Your friend takes his hand away and before you can even open your mouth to say anything, the highblood's head is ripped clean off his shoulders.

You desperately wish you could say it was too fast or too dark for you to see, but it isn't. You hear the vertebrae in his neck and spine crack and pop as they're pulled far more than they were ever meant to go, and then torn off with noises that you will never forget. As you watch the now dead highblood fall to the side with a dull thud, and your stupid, awful brain can't help but think "god i wish that were me" when you peek up to Sollux's still ice-cold expression, tightly concentrated on one thing.

As you watch, your heart pounds in your chest and you feel light in the head. When you glance up at Sollux again, the light from his eyes illuminates his facial features, like smoothed out marble or paint on a canvas. The way he exuded such power turned your legs and organs to jelly. Your eyes rapidly move from him to his victim so fast, you're surprised they didn't pop out of your skull and roll into the nasty, cold blood that's now all over your doorstep.

Sollux takes a minute to come down from...wherever he was and you stare at him the entire time. His eyebrows knit together, his eyes squeeze shut, and his hands slowly go up to cradle his head. You're still staring. A valley of silence hits you like the falling action in a play and it feels like hours that you two are just standing there. You didn't realize you were holding your breath, and your deep exhale makes him jump. It's almost funny.

He takes his hands away and takes a deep breath, gaze coming up to meet yours with a hint of that anger still hanging over him. It makes you shudder and put a hand to your chest.

"Where can I throw this." He sounds exhausted, tone completely even and stoic. You don't say anything, and just shakily hold up a finger in a direction that's nothing but grass and dirt. He doesn't respond, the whole corpse lifting off the ground and being ejected into the sky until you can't even see it over the horizon. He sighs and walks towards you and you almost slam the door on him like you didn't even learn your lesson. Sollux shoves you in the shoulder and you don't stop him from walking into your hive and tracking indigo footprints on your rock hard floors when he walked right into that gross puddle of blood.

You still don't say anything when he sits on your couch, arms on either side of him and head slung against the edge with his eyes closed. He looks like a corpse, and you would be fooled into thinking he were one if you didn't see the deep rise and fall of his chest and the slight twitch of his fingers. You stare at him for a little longer from across the room and then close the door, with you on the outside of your hive.

There's probably a lesson in trying to lock those you care about and those who care about you out of your life so determinedly but that's not the case here. This was the more appealing option than running upstairs and locking the door to your block so you can just. Simmer. And process. And by process you mean bringing the collar of your sweater up to your entire face to hide the color reaching up to your ears.

Images of Sollux's face fade in and our of your head and you try to pound them out by gently whacking your forehead against the stone wall next to your door. You imagine him looking at you that way, holding your chin delicately in his hand, still coated with that indigo blood you're currently stepping in (even though he didn't touch the troll, what the fuck, Brain Karkat) and angrily pulling you up to brush noses with him, slowly closing the distance until you--

You start hitting your head harder against the wall and desperately try to think of something else.

You're definitely feeling...something. Something somewhere in your something that you're choosing to keep vague and not dive further into for fear of what you've suddenly discovered in yourself. It takes a whole fifteen minutes to get your shit together and you start to feel a bit chilly from the air. Yeah, inside sounds good. Sollux hasn't moved an inch, and you think he might've fallen asleep. Right as you think that, one of his eyes peek open and he speaks. "Is it that hard for you to be in the same space as me?" His voice is soft and close to monotone, but not quite. You see a twitch of his smile, but it's bittersweet.

A beat of silence follows with you while you stand perfectly still, your hands behind your back, resting on the doorknob, and you don't respond.  
Instead, you go to your nutrition-block, grab him a mug, fill it with water, and place it in next to him on the couch whilst sitting on the arm, opposite to him. He doesn't say anything, snatching it up and gulping it down in one go like he's never had water before. 

"It's nothing personal," is what you manage to scratch up as an answer, quiet and meek.

Sollux shrugs, face neutral again. "Yeah, I know." He stares at the mug you gave him, running his fingers along it and turning it in his hands. It's quiet again, nothing but the soft sound of skin running across ceramic filling the stagnant air. You stare him him a little more, watching as he slowly slumps further and further into the couch.

There's an obvious question sitting between the two of you. You're only half-sure of what the answer is, and you're fully nervous of what it'll end up being. It repeats in your head, over and over again, like you're unable to think of anything else besides it.  
Why did you do that? Was he protective of you? Worried for your safety? Did he have to do it so...like that? No, there's no doubt he didn't have to be so needlessly violent, it's not like....Okay, Karkat, think rationally. How would someone turn this into an insult. You try to remember his annoying, grating voice as well as you can in your head. _Eheheh, dont make it weird, Vantas, I was only keeping you alive cause i knew you wouldn't be able to do it yourself and definitely not because i care deeply about you, perhaps as more than--_ _  
.._.And that's where you stop thinking, as fast as possible. You don't like that train of thought. Not when you're five feet apart, and especially when you're already struggling to keep unrealistic images of him out of your head.

Regardless, the silence has to be filled, and the trunkbeast has to be addressed. One way or another, at least.

"Was that...the first time you've done that?"

"What? Killed someone?" The way he responds to you is almost too casual. 

"No, well yes, but specifically, uh. Specifically like that."

"I only fight like that in self defense but I've never...gone all out like that before. And it didn't help that I spent so long harassing you. I'm totally drained."

"Harassing is a good way to phrase it." You bend your knee up against your chest and prop your elbow up on it, smooshing your face against your fist. He makes that ratty little snicker you hate and it makes your stomach do that little flip that you hate more.

More silence. Except it looks like Sollux is finally catching on to the tension that you've been feeling and decides to take initiative this time.

"Well since I'm here, you might as well take me upstairs so I can get a better look at that piece of trash you're keeping in the corner." He sits up like he's expecting you to actually take him to your block and it makes you roll your eyes. Out of spite, you almost deny him of that pleasure, but then it's back to Quiet Town and oh god you do not want that.

  
"If I didn't know better, I might've thought this was an elaborate set up to get in my hive and trash my shit up." You get up as well, hands deep in your pockets, covering as much skin as you can. You're very careful at keeping yourself at least four to five feet away from him while you lead him upstairs, just like you've practiced. He doesn't make it easy though, walking close up to you and even trying to shove you playfully as you walk. You easily dodge out of the way of that though, mostly because he's walking like a zombie, and might pass out at any minute.

He's so casual with you, it almost makes you sick and definitely makes you wish for a life where you were hatched normal and you could be the same to him.

The second you get in your block, he sits on the floor next to the entrance, breathing heavily like the mere act of walking up stairs was too much for him. He's really worn out, isn't he? Tired and vulnerable. If you didn't just watch him pop the top off a whole other person, you'd be worried about being able to take advantage of him. The way his thin shoulders scrunch together, and his flat, smooth chest rises and falls--You're really not sure what it is you're feeling, but whatever it is, it's entirely inappropriate and wrong and gross and bad. And he's just letting you see this part of him! You'd rather bury yourself alive then show him that courtesy. You shake your head, bite the inside of your mouth, _hard,_ and turn around to gesture to your set up. 

Sollux doesn't say anything, still getting his shit together over going up _stairs_ for Christ's sake. But when he does, it's not about computers. "I really hate to ask you this but. I don't think I'll be able to fly back home before morning." You squint at him, pretending to be annoyed to hopefully mask how nervous the thought of having another troll in the same building with you while you _slept_ makes you. Assuming you'd even be able to sleep. The squint also keeps you from looking at him like you care about how difficult is clearly is for him to ask this of you. "I know--I couldn't ask to take your 'coon from you, and I don't expect you to have the supplies to put me up. I don't need much, just somewhere to lay down. I'll be out of your horns before you even wake up." The tone he uses is almost like he's begging you and it makes you melt further than you thought you could melt. 

This is why you don't let people into your hive. He's playing you like a fucking pinata, batting you around by going from sexy powerhouse freak with no shits to give to soft,meek and at your mercy.

You sigh and pretend to be annoyed, turning around to hide the face of a troll who is truly ashamed of thinking those thoughts he just thought.

Of course you have sopor patches in your closet. There's a whole duffel bag that straps to your back in the topmost shelf loaded with supplies in case you needed to leave immediately and wouldn't have time to pack. Alongside the patches are at least two weeks worth of rations, three changes of clothes, first aid kit and some spare money for emergency anything and wrapped up in a thick, temperature control tarp and metal folding rods to help pitch a tent. You have to dig for a bit, but you find the patches and toss them to his lap and he jumps, holding them up and squishing them in relief.

"My hull is open to you while you stay, you can do whatever you want just don't bother me or my lusus. Don't be a gross fucking goblin like you always are and keep your stink to yourself." You're trying to sound tough and stern, but it's really hard when he's got that big of a smile on his face, staring up at you while you talk in a way so tender you want to kick him in the ribs for it just to make you feel more like yourself with him.

He finally stands up and walks over to you, squishing the sopor packet in one hand and holding his other up, clearly expecting a fist bump from you, and you stare at it _juuust_ long enough to make him sweat and then return it, touching him for not even half a second. "Thanks, dude. I'll make it up to you when I get back."

"By that, do you mean you _won't_ torment me for a whole evening? Wow, Captor, I wouldn't wanna expect something so generous for letting you stay in the sanctuary that is my hive instead of cooking out in the sun."

"Yeah yeah, we get it, you're doing me a big solid here and I already said I appreciate it. Let's just say I owe you, does that satisfy you? Are we even?"

"We'll be even when the debt has been paid, for now, I have you in my little pocket, rat boy."

Sollux lolls his head back and too the side, his way of showing you that he's rolling his eyes, and groans. "Fucking epic, supreme overlord KK in the building, shining light off how supreme and phenomenal he is, Troll Buhill Ghates? I don't even know him, what does he do? Donate to charity? Forget that bitch." He's stopped talking to your face while he's chattering on, and turned around halfway to look at your desktop and tries to open up the tower. You want to grab him out of instinct of not wanting people to touch your fucking stuff but that would require touching _him_ and you're not really ready to do that.

You let him fiddle with your wires, "let" him log into your computer (he asks you for the password but doesn't let you finish, like he already knew what it was and you don't doubt he did) and download a whole bunch of programs that supposedly help clean junk files and scan for malware and all that nice shit and even give you the code to download a game you've been wanting for awhile. You insist to him that this doesn't mean that you're even, but he dismisses you pretty quickly and dispassionately.

After that, he says he's tired, takes the sopor patches and leaves your block, moving like he's dragging his own body around like a wrigglerhood blanket. True to his word, he's gone before you wake up. The anxiety kept you awake almost the whole day. Not a crumb taken from your thermal hull, and not a peep from him at all. You actually didn't notice he'd left until you went down to finally attempt to scrub out the bloody footprints off your floor.

When you're finally alone, you let yourself think about how he looked yesterday with rage in his eyes and sparks flying off his skin. You describe the whole event to Crabdad, and you can't help the way your voice seems to float out of you.

**Author's Note:**

> Did you know i have a tumblr where i post my crackheaded sollux and solkat content?  
> follow me at steph-is-asleep


End file.
